oh happy day

just turned around and was suddenly aware of the sexy mexican sitting on my bed strumming quietly on his guitar and singing pink floyd songs. and i'm on my computer why??? bye!

random drunken musings

It seems that most of my friends are 2-5 years younger than me. not a big deal, right? went out for drinks with a friend the age of another close friend of several years, but who i used to teach/babysit/chaperone, who i was at one time a sort of older 'role model' to, i suppose, and we polished off a rather respectable amount of wine together, and shared boyfriend/parent/life stories together, and then suddenly i felt like a total friend-cougar (non-sexual, though) or something on my way home . . . like i'd broken a trust or a code . . . but we're adults! right? besides, i've also got older friends . . . sometimes much older colleagues, the age of my parents, and i've gone out drinking with them . . . . maybe it's just that i'm really truly fully in the adult world, where age is really "just a number." Just a number. 30. 5 (months). Just a number. No?

i think my blog is boring.

security blankets and other talismans

When I was 10, I was given a teddy bear that became my good luck bear and special little friend. I took him whereever I went, even as an adult. 5 years ago he went missing. Today, suddenly, I miss him again. Ah, lost goodness and innocence!

Why am I so tired???

I realize we've been having dreary weather, but this is a little nuts. My skin's a mess, I've got bags under my eyes . . . . What's going on??? It's summer! I'm free! I'm working part-time (well, more part-time than I'm technically getting paid for . . . but it's keeping me from completely totally unmanagable debt) I live close to the beach, I have no school (though I do have a number of professional application form that are overdue to be filled out) and I have a job this fall. Finishing school should feel much better than this. Maybe I shouldn't have taken the extra mini-job and just enjoyed some free time and accepted the extra debt this summer. Or maybe I just need to get my room cleaned up and myself to bed earlier at night. Maybe I need to infect my computer with a virus that blocks my access to facebook, and all internet sites other than necessary email and work sites. Maybe I just need a nap.

Run run, run run

. . . why do i want to run away again?

not quite on vacation

it's summer here. it's hot. i've suddenly re-discovered just how broke i am. i'm working part time. lots of time off. no money to enjoy it. i want a holiday . . . hey artsmonkey, i miss our last holiday . . . .

well, shot of tequila and i'm off to to the beach ('cause i can't afford gelato and i have to leave to relax . . . how silly is that?)